You are brave for even clicking on a piece with the words chamois cream in the title. It’s definitely challenging to write about our intimate friend without completely over-sharing, but in this case, have no fear. I was inspired to write this post after an unusual experience at Interbike.
So the day before the first day of Outdoor Demo at Interbike I had gotten stung by a wasp. While the swelling was reducing, my puffy arm in the desert heat itched as badly as the time I fell into fiberglass insulation.
I had been on a Benedryl-seeking mission for the entire morning, and wasn’t having any luck, besides an offer of intravenous antihistamine that would have taken me out of commission for the day, or possibly induced narcolepsy out on course, which seemed like a hazard that I could suffer some itching for.
In asking around, an AsMaster chamois cream rep overheard my dilemma and offered me a test packet of chamois cream to relieve my itching.
I politely took it and thanked him, glad for a bit of my favorite silky-smooth chamois cream, but not all that excited to smear it all over my arm and be slimy all day. But sometimes desperate itching calls for desperate measures, like applying a product that advertises that it “soothes tenderloins” all over your arm in public.
It wasn’t a case of instant relief like you get when you find a hidden pack of chamois cream on mile 80 of your ride and pull over for a reapplication, but it did make my arm feel good enough that I could focus on the responsiveness of new 29ers or pressure points in shoes for the rest of the day.
Then, on the plane home I began to itch again. I had unidentified insect bites everywhere and I was scratching my skin off like a tweaker with hives and the passengers on either side of me were inching farther and farther away as I became more and more frantic with my itching.
Without knowing what relief I would find there, I grabbed my purse and dug, looking for anything that would distract me. Chewing gum distracted me for a moment, but as I continued digging I discovered a packet of AsMaster at the bottom of my purse — no surprise, as any typical American girl undoubtedly has a stockpile of emergency chamois cream in her purse.
Remembering the success I had with applying the chamois cream to the wasp sting, I tore open the packet with a crossed-out drawing of a butt bent over and emitting lightning bolts from it and began dabbing the white paste on my bites. Ahhh, sweet, instantaneous relief. My bites stopped itching nearly immediately and it took several hours before they began to itch again.
The tense muscles in my terrified neighbors’ faces began to relax and they slowly sat back in their seats, no longer checking for the nearest emergency exits. I, too, relaxed in my seat and promptly fell asleep.
I have used it as a recovery aid for chafing in the past and found it worked great, but I now plan on keeping a packet in any first aid kit as my duct tape (cure-all) for skin problems.
As a chamois cream, it is stain-free and easy to wash out. I also like Sportique Century Riding Cream, but the smell is so strong my whole car often smells like chamois cream, which isn’t really a smell I prefer people to associate with me. AsMaster has a subtle smell and soft feel that you don’t notice. As someone not into Euro style, I really don’t see any reason your chamois cream should draw attention to itself in smell or feel, and after my eye-opening bug bite experiences, I have new respect for AsMaster and its many uses.